what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
