My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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