The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize