He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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