If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
