My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
