If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
