I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
party gras won. party gras always wins.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
