I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
her vagine was all disorganized.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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