I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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