Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
