I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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