Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
