addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
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