I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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