I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
