I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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