Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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