If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
