we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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