I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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