We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he thought i was a dude.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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