so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
