i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
