She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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