Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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