i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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