Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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