What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
