There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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