I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
i think my cat just said my name.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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