if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Randomize
