How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Randomize
