Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I CAN MOONWALK!
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
