I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
