so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
