Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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