I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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