you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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