hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Sorry my hands just texted you
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize