so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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