People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
