Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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