There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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