They should really pass out barf bags in church
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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