Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
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