Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize