quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
