O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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