Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
